Grand Prix Women
Lets see, what did I promised the last time? Although I promised it in Dutch, I decided to keep my promise in English. For me it's a bit more difficult, but for a lot of you on this world wide thing called Internet, it's a lot easier to understand. So my promise was to tell you all something about the women in the lives of the Grand Prix men. Do they have time for women? You might ask. The answer is YES. In a matter of fact, they seem to reserve a lot of time for it. Because they are supposed to have fights about women. And if you have time for fighting about women, you sure have to spend time getting involved with one.
It's Heinz oops Schumachers wife. (Corina)
For starters Heinz Harald Frenzen is not really one of the most happy men concerning women. First he had this German girlfriend Corina, who strangely enough got swept of her feet by Schumacher. Schumi and Corina got married and she gave him a babygirl named Gina Mary. You can imagine that Heinz wasn't very happy with this, but he got over it and got himself a new girlfriend. She's very pretty (maybe even better than Corina) and now the story goes that Heinz is not the only one who thinks so. So take a wild guess. Yes, the rumors are his teammate Jacques Villeneuve really fancies her. Poor, poor Heinz Harald Frenzen. But why? Why? You ask yourself. Why does Jacques fancy HH's girlfriend, doesn't little Jacques have a girlfriend of his own? The answer is no, not anymore. He used to go out with this Canadian girl Sandrine who was a student. Last year their relationship looked somewhat like a traffic light. At one moment they where dating, at the other they weren't. But this year they made a decision and maybe HH girlfriend helped Jacques to make this decision.
Yeah Jacques, dump the nice girl, why don't you! (Sandrine)
Jean Alesi is supposed to have a very attractive wife, she's a Japanese TV presenter and as far as I know he has her all for himself. There is only one minor detail, he is so crazy about her that she isn't allowed to come into the pits anymore as Jean has trouble concentrating when she is around. Oh man, life isn't easy being a formula one driver, lots of money, beautiful women and doing what you like most in life, racing. Another nice story is a story about Coulthard, one time he showed up at a race with this Canadian model. The story went that he just broke up with his longtime girlfriend Murray. And there was Coulthard with a model. He should be punished you may think. Don't worry, he was. The same night he had to explain himself to his mommy. So that should teach him fooling around with models.
But this is not what we want to hear, now do we? (This part is especially for the ladies) We want to know about the bachelors and not any bachelor, no, we want to know about the GORGEOUS bachelors! And who's gorgeous and a bachelor. Well, there is hope, it is Eddie Irvine! So ladies, strike while you still can. If you don't know how, I personally give you some tips about his interests (and remember I'm not doing myself a favour by telling you this, because now I will have less chance myself, so be thankful). If you are in a bar and suddenly there's Eddy, offer him a Miller beer, because that's what he likes best, then start talking about economics, because after racing this is his main interest. Other topics to discuss are: Black Adder, various documentaries and Sinead O'Connor (better not talk about her, if you want to keep his mind on yourself). He also likes to play golf and his heroes are Ayrton Senna (of course) and George Best (a soccerplayer for got sakes!). Don't be a bore. Eddie really hates boring people. What he also hates is bureaucracy, but hey, that's not something you find in a cafe now do you? Eddie is known to go out a lot and he seems to be very fond of girls, so good luck ladies.
How did the race go? It looked a bit boring, with the two McLaren winning again. Hakkinen won by himself this time, so that's a big change. In the back field there was a big war going on. Didn't we all hope for the confrontation between Eddie and Alesi? Call me a sensationalist, but I wished something had gone wrong. Last time it did they only yelled at each other and called each other names. This was very funny because hearing Alesi swear in English is big fun. Eddie izz a arrogante azzole, yezz. Well maybe next time. What I really wanted to talk about was the press conference. For starters, Hakkinen almost fell asleep during his speech and was sweating like crazy. Why wasn't Schumacher sweating and why the fuck was he practising signlanguage during Hakkinen's speech. Maybe I will never know or maybe someone can tell me. Until next time, please take care of the McLarens and yourself.
Next week we will all enjoy the grand prix of Argentina, if the race is a bit more spectacular I will, promise, tell some more about that.